In Response to Swansea University (Repost)

I had to re-post this blog.. Our lovely documentary creators wrote a fabulous response to Swansea University in the UK who shut down their pole program in September.  Now, they are not only filmmakers, but pole activists!  I think it is very important to note that this blog was written by a MALE.  And not just any male, but one that has been following Jagged around since 2010, interviewed many different polers outside of Jagged, and seen many pole shows in between.

Anyone who does pole should be prepared to be an advocate and activist by default.  There are so many great things about getting involved with this new art form, but because it is in it's infancy, we have to be prepared to patiently educate others and stand up for what we do at times on a daily basis.

Read here: 

In Response to Swansea University

An Ugly Woman (Updated)

I have no idea what this lady looks like physically, but by listening to her voicemails I know that she is an ugly woman inside.  The amount of hatred and disdain in her voice sinks into my bones and angers me from the inside out.

This is a voicemail left at the pole studio I taught at in Nashville, TN this morning at 2:30am.  This studio was my second home in the south and the owner, instructors, and students were family.  This woman, Alicia Hilliard, clearly was not a part of this family and wants to pass judgement on people she has never interacted with.  She is angry that Urban Studio is participating in the Light The Night Walk which raises money, spreads awareness, and honors the memory of survivors and victims of Leukemia and Lymphoma. All she sees when she thinks of this studio is a bunch of sinners participating in "whore-ish activity."  WHAT CENTURY IS THIS?  Does she know the kind hearted instructors and students that occupy this space?  They are estheticians, phone company workers, athletes, teachers, mothers, and business women.  They are some of the nicest women I've ever met.  They are a community that supports each other much like women in a church would support each other, perhaps with less judgement involved. 

In addition to many of her other ignorant statements such as a bomb threat and gay bashing, Alicia ASSUMES the reason Urban Studio is participating in this event is simply to take advantage of those who have suffered to advertise and get attention in the media.  Here the studio is trying to do something nice in the community and she wants to pass judgement. If she's as religious as she says she should take a leaf out of her own book and know the only person who can judge you is god.  

Alicia doesn't know that we lost a beautiful and talented instructor to leukemia in February earlier this year named Nicole Gallo Hagler. 

Flying effortlessly

She was a strong and talented pole dancer who touched a lot of lives.  The best pole dancer in Tennessee in my opinion!  I danced with her at her last pole performance the week before she passed away and couldn't believe that someone so young (33) that took such good care of their bodies could go so suddenly and unexpectedly.  We were actually at the studio together making pictures and signs for Nicole when we got the call that she didn't make it. 

So when Alicia, an outspoken survivor of the disease, thinks the experience is not personal for us she has no idea what we've been through or what context her words are landing in.  She needs to educate herself on the pole dancing community as a whole and the specific people she is speaking so hatefully to.

Let's all pray for Alicia Hilliard who conveniently left her number in the voicemail in case anyone would like to speak with her.  If anyone knows this woman personally, please feel free to share my words.     

If you would like to donate to Urban Studio's Light The Night Walk (or better yet participate if you are in the Nashville area!) please visit their page here: Light The Night Walk: Urban Studio

**UPDATE!  The studio owner reported her call to the police.  I attempted to contact Alicia Hilliard myself after I wrote this blog, but her voicemail was full so I couldn't leave a message.  My plan was to invite her to a class free of charge with the studio owner's permission so that she could meet some of the women in the class and experience first hand what it is we do.  We had a brief text conversation since I couldn't leave a voicemail.  I was very kind to her and asked if we could have a conversation to understand each other better and she agreed, but wouldn't call me back.  From what I've heard, she blocked a whole bunch of other people attempting to exchange words with her and has been thoroughly shamed.  She messed with the wrong group of people!!!

On a positive note, Light the Night was a success and Urban Studio was able to meet their monetary charity goal for the Leukemia Lymphoma Society.  Thank you for all your contributions whether it was through donations or supportive words.       

Copy Cats

Ripping off someone's work is never acceptable, but the lines between blatant plagiarism and adapting movement can be blurred.  I came across this video some months ago on Facebook and got to thinking about how many pole moves I've used that I've gotten from others and how many new moves I've been so eager to learn.  I personally believe tricks should be shared and taught to everyone to enjoy rather than safeguarded.  On the other hand, I've seen entire pole routines and trick sequences copied almost move for move set to a different song and not only is it disrespectful to the creators, its BORING.  The first time I see something I can appreciate its beauty, the second time I see it done by someone else the exact same way it feels cheap.

Original work should be respected.  If you've ever tried to create a trick, choreography, or anything for that matter that is completely original you will understand what amount of love, hate, work, and soul goes into the birth of it.  It is easy for us with so much access to media on facebook and youtube to find the newest hot trick and copy it, but it is a much more difficult task to create.

When I was shiny and new to pole dancing, it was easy to think of all the possibilities because I had nothing to reference.  Over time it became more difficult because you start watching more pole and learning the right and wrong ways to do things.  For example I learned after my first year poling you don't just invert right into an outside leg hang you invert with a straddle to make a clean transition.  There are many possible ways to get in and out of each move, but generally there is a standard way and variations which all vary depending on who and where you're learning.  You can become trapped in routine or favor of a certain way to enter and exit a trick.  These references from youtube videos or teachers can be hard to break out of once you've engrained it in your muscle memory.

But how do we share this pole vocabulary and still respect those who created it?  How can you watch "The Nutcracker" and still want to see "Swan Lake" even though they are both using the same vocabulary of ballet?  Can you do the same combination of tricks and keep it fresh?  Often it is the context that you put the trick in that makes it interesting.  Make it your own.  For example, don't do trick sequences in the same order that you originally learned or saw it in.  Create a new transition into a trick or create your own variation.  Can you take one arm off?  One leg? bend a leg that was straight?  How can you change that trick to make a new picture?  Can you transition into a different trick from that outside leg hang or get there a different way?  Experiment with speed and musical timing.  Play with a move on spinning vs. static.  As you're reading this, you may be coming up with your own ideas on how to put a spin on something you already know.  By putting in a little time and effort, you can make it your own.  Challenge yourself, utilize your intelligence, and become your own creator...I'm sure the result will be proudly original and beautiful to watch!

Finding Your Freestyle

Freestyle is a great tool for performing as well as creating set choreography.  I wanted to share this video because it offers some great advice on how to improve your freestyle as a pole dancer.

In the video Tracee Kafer points out that many of us love to throw in as many tricks as possible.  It is very easy to rely on tricks because they are already familiar to you and impressive to the viewer (whether "the viewer" be yourself or a crowd).  The in betweens are harder because you have to create them as you go and make split second decisions throughout the piece.  It can be stressful, yet this is what makes freestyle so beautiful and freeing.  If you choose to do tricks the whole time it defeats the purpose and becomes boring and predictable.  Not only that, but you can easily tire yourself out physically if you don't pace yourself.  As a viewer, tricks will be enjoyed and appreciated more if they are interspersed within the piece so that there are dynamic and exciting energy changes.  If you picture your energy as a line, doing amazing high energy tricks one after another still creates a straight line.  If you pick and choose where to insert a trick and where to pause or elongate some movements you will create many ups and downs in your energy line to keep the viewer interested. 

Another point Tracee brought up was that she worked with the dancer Rian on her freestyle several times in a row to the same song to see improvements.  Freestyle implies something spontaneous and unplanned, but just like anything else you must practice to excel at it.  Each split second decision you make to put an arm here, or change speed, or become soft, you are in fact planning ahead.  The more you practice the better you become at following your own intuition on decision making, and taking time to listen to the music resulting in a more satisfying less stressful freestyle.   

Tracee also says SLOW DOWN!  This is something I struggle with..there are times I've performed when I FEEL like I was holding something for a good enough period of time but when I look back at the video it was way faster than I thought.  With pole, you need to give people a moment to absorb whats happening.  You may know the trick you're getting into, but the average person has no idea what you're doing and needs time to learn to watch you up there flying around!  Jagged has worked on taking our time instead of throwing tons of choreography and tricks out at once.  It is a skill that can take time to develop.

Happy freestyling!

Pole Plateau

Every pole dancer reaches a point where their skills plateau.  Much like the picture above of Tony Hawk's first attempt at a back flip in 1997, this is where we all start.   If you're truly pushing yourself chances are you've fallen a few times.  Early in your pole dancing life your skills quickly increase as you learn a multitude of beginner moves, spins, and tricks, but eventually things begin to slow down.  It's difficult when you reach the edge of your abilities and realize all the maneuvers that are beyond you.  I have reached that point.  I've built up a new level of strength I never had before finding pole and learned all the moves I can physically handle, but I will always want MORE!  I know I've reached my plateau because I have mastered this skill set so well it is rarely uncomfortable anymore.

I think back to earlier in my pole life and I vaguely remember not being able to invert from the air on spinning pole.  I remember straining to get my hips up and clumsily using my feet to pull me the rest of the way upside down.  Now when I try a trick that is difficult for me it is so advanced I don't feel I can even begin to strain or hold it and they feel almost unimaginable for my body to achieve.  I wonder if I've been in a comfortable place for too long. I don't know what it's like to feel uncomfortable anymore and many things I want to try simply aren't safe without someone experienced to spot me.  As an instructor, dance company director, and working day jobs on the side I have lost the time to continue my own training.  There are always too many dances to be choreographed and too many classes spent teaching people who are at a less advanced place than I to focus on myself.

But I am realizing making time to continue my own education and being forever a student is extremely valuable to myself and the people I train who also need to expand their skill set.  This brings me to a warning.  There are many online resources nowadays where you can learn from home and even youtube can be a simple solution for finding inspiration, but there is no substitution for face to face instruction.  Learning at home through an online resource especially for beginners can lead to many unsafe situations and injury.  I think these online classes are great for instructors and more advanced polers that have plenty of body awareness to expand their repertoire.  Even after pole dancing for three years and growing up classically trained in dance, I still find things on youtube I want to try and will attempt over and over to figure it out to no avail.  Then I'll take a class and ask a teacher about the same trick and get it in five minutes.  This is because the instructor knows how to do this trick well and can physically cue me on top of explaining it in detail.  You cannot be physically cued over a computer.  Point being: always take new moves to an experienced instructor to help you with until you can do it on your own at home!

We cannot forget our humble beginnings attempting to spin, struggling to climb and invert, bearing the pain on our skin, and sometimes falling flat on our face like Tony Hawk.  In our pole dancing and life in general, we thrive on stress and struggle and progress through challenges.  It is essential to continue to push ourselves into places of discomfort and vulnerability in all aspects of life or we will remain stagnant on the plateau when we could be climbing mountains.

-Jessica

Approval

The innate need for approval seems to be universal. As pole dancing progresses, we demand a greater level of approval of everyone from our parents to world recognized competitions like the olympics.

As Thanksgiving approaches, I am thankful I have the approval and support of my parents. My Dad, who is traveling around the world on a sailboat with my 12 yr. old little bro and my stepmother, called me from the middle of the ocean yesterday and we caught up on things. His approval of my life truly affirms me in ways that are deeper than I had imagined now that I am in my mid twenties. I thought of approval being more important when you are young, but I feel that it matters more and more to me as I come into adulthood. My mother is also supportive in a different kind of way. She doesn't disapprove outwardly of what I do with pole dancing, but she isn't exactly happy about the path that I've chosen either. I know that she would prefer me to get a normal 9-5 job that has a set salary and health benefits, but instead I am teaching pole dance, doing odd jobs for extra income, and running Jagged. I do have larger goals in mind that will make my life more stable in the way that she wants, but still involve the art I am so passionate about: pole dancing. She seems to shower approval on me only when I am successful in public ways such as being on America's Best Dance Crew or being the subject of a documentary, yet every time we talk it seems that I cannot win her approval (typical mom right!). She is either disapproving or benevolent. My mom does support me every now and then financially for example, when I need to fly back to LA for last minute Jagged business, for which I am thankful.

My parents approve of me in different ways, but of the two the one that has the greatest influence in my life is my father's. I can tell from the pride I hear in his voice and the way he beams at me when he tells me word for word how proud he is of all that I am doing and all that I have done. It wouldn't matter to him if it were pole dancing or rocket science. I can feel so lost and unsure at times and he makes me feel like I'm on the right track. The emotional gratification I get from that is painfully awesome! I respect his opinion because he is always real with me and tells me when I'm out of line or supports my thinking.

Some people are not so lucky. I had a regular pole student who is the sweetest hard working girl, and I asked her if she would like to help out at one of our Jagged South show's in Nashville wiping poles since she was planning on attending. At first she was really excited about it...most people in the south haven't been seen on a pole publicly outside of a strip club. Being from California, these things aren't so uncommon haha. Later, she told me that her father is a pastor and her pole dancing classes are a secret from him. Her mom knows but she was mortified at the idea of her daughter being seen anywhere near a pole publicly, and didn't even want her going to the show at all. She still came against her mother's wishes, but she didn't end up wiping poles and just stood to the side of the stage the whole time. Her mother's feelings about it mattered to her enough to respect not actually getting on the pole yet she was brave enough to defy her in being simply being present simultaneously wanting approval and tossing up the middle finger.

Most of us pole dancers don't give a crap in the first place because we're POLE DANCERS for god sakes! With the exception of the dancers who may have corporate jobs and want it to stay part of their private life, there are constantly pole pictures and videos bombarding my facebook newsfeed! I don't think twice about it in California, but here in the South I find myself being slightly more timid about random things. I was actually embarrassed carrying my pole through downtown to set up at a venue in broad daylight. In LA I wouldn't think twice and would even relish in watching peoples' expressions, shock, or questions. I think it's because here it's less shocking and more judgement being passed. I get nervous to interview a new potential roomie because there's a pole in my living room and I know I'll have to face the age old back and forth:

Random Person: "WHOA is that a stripper pole?" Me: "Yeah...well it's just a pole you can leave out the stripper part" RP: "So are you a stripper?" Me: "No I'm a pole dancer" RP: "So exotic dancer?" Me: "No, I pole dance but with my clothes on" RP: "...?" Me: "WELL I have this dance company called Jagged.."

AND SO ON. I have had to patiently explain these things to people time and time again and they usually still don't get it and keep making dirty jokes until they see it in person or take a class.

On a global scale, I think the entire pole dance community is asking for approval in so many ways. Through ever more serious competitions, published books, street poling, and fight for pole dancing to be accepted as an olympic sport we seek to be recognized world wide "OFFICIALLY!" I am all for it! Will I be an aspiring olympian? Probably not. I think it would be an amazing step forward on the whole towards a greater approval around the world, but I do it for the joy of pole dancing itself (and a little extra money!).

It is painful not to have the approval of those around you for something you love so much in any aspect of your life whether it be a relationship, a career, or even pole dancing. This is an insatiable need even if you understand you cannot ever have it from some people. All you can do is make yourself happy and do it because of your own love for the thing itself. Pole dancing in particular is such a niche community (although growing all the time!) that we tend to band together, so you can take comfort in the knowledge that we support you! :D I've met some of my best friends through pole dancing, and I feel the support and the love all the time from strangers on the other side of the globe through things as simple as a facebook like! Approval may never be had, but we will persevere.

Take all those negative thoughts and feelings, and let it fuel your success. You can't spend your whole life dedicated to those who disapprove of you and proving them wrong, but if you love it and you prove them wrong at the same time it'll mean that much more to you for the fight you put up! I can only hope I continue on the upward track and that I don't end up eating my words haha.

Jessica

Injury

Injury is inevitable.  When you're young you don't think about injury very often until it happens because your body is so resilient.  It's like one day I turned 24 (still very young I know, but not in dancer standards!) and my body started falling apart!  One day my hamstrings are pulled, the next my sacrum feels jammed from the scoliosis in my spine, the next my ankle is strained.  As a trained dancer coming into the world of pole dancing three years ago I have definitely pushed my body to it's extremes and taken it to new levels I never could have achieved on the ground alone.  On the one hand my body is stronger than it's ever been, but my injuries are more crippling.

I've learned to live with injuries, and trust my body.  It's resilience is truly amazing!  My hamstrings took 9 months to heal, but now they feel great!  I thought they'd be permanently damaged and I'd never be able to attempt a proper split again, but I just laid off the split moves for a while and gently started stretching and strengthening over time.  In the last couple years I've had many injuries like this and have recovered, but I find myself wondering what body parts are the most important to me.  As a pole dancer, I'd have to say MY ARMS!

I figured that out three weeks ago when I partially dislocated my shoulder.  I was tired from teaching three classes that day, and during the fourth I was asked to demonstrate a move I don't normally teach.  It was an relatively easy move.. a slide down the pole into a split on the ground.  OR SO I THOUGHT..and BAM! shoulder pops out.  Instinctively, I engaged all my muscles so I wouldn't just fall right off the pole and once I got to the ground it popped back in!  I think if I hadn't done that it would have come all the way out. In any case, I knew instantly that it was real bad and that I wouldn't be able to use my right arm at all.  Luckily, the studio owner was there to help out with this particular pole party and was able to demonstrate moves for the duration of the class.  I maintained my calm until I got to my car and couldn't even put my purse in the seat next to me without extreme pain.  I pretty much lost it from there.

Verdict:  Partially torn bicep ligaments and rotator cuff (terus minor).  Or so my PT friend tells me since I have no insurance :) ahhh the life of a dancer.  Absolutely no poling.  Looking at two months or more of being grounded depending on how it heals.  I couldn't even lift my arm to 45 degrees without pain let alone lift my body weight upside down.

This absolutely terrified me.  I've been injured before, but I found myself wondering if I'd ever get on a pole again!  As a dancer coming from the ground, becoming a vertical dancer has been the most thrilling experience I've ever had and I felt heartbroken at being grounded for an undetermined amount of time.  Getting up there again seemed so far off to me seeing as how I couldn't even wash my own hair or take off my shirt without a struggle (darn wide muscular shoulders!).  Not to mention I walk dogs during the day and teach pole classes or parties every day and night as my only sources of income.. I realized just how valuable my arm is to me.  I went through days of depression and feelings of helplessness, but I knew I had to get over it and figure it out.  SO I've gotten much better at teaching verbally, and doing spins on my left arm.  It has been hard to teach anything that involves climbing, inverting, etc. but luckily I have regular students I have demonstrate for me.

Progress is slow, but steady.  By my first week I was able to raise my arm all the way 180 degrees up to my ear before I felt pain.  By my second week I gently attempted climbing again and this week I did a few spins on my bad arm and inverted!  I'm afraid of going too fast and injuring myself further because if I rip that rotator cuff all the way the only thing that will fix it is surgery and then a much longer recovery time.  It's been super frustrating especially when all I do is teach people how to get airborne and have to stay on the ground, but I am determined to make a full recovery and I know I will get back up there soon.

I have taken pleasure in helping other people grow and ironically taught a deaf girl in one of my classes which was really inspiring for me during this challenging time.  I taught this girl who CAN'T HEAR a chair and pole dance that was really hard.  Had I known I would have choreographed something easier and more rhythmic, but I'm glad I didn't because she caught on just fine and was killing this dance better than anyone in the class!  Just goes to show you how people can overcome these physical challenges like that one armed pole dancer Deborah Roach, or another girl I taught that only had ONE LEG.  It was just what I needed in that moment.

Anyhoo, these are lessons I have learned that hopefully every dancer/aerialist can benefit from:

1. STAY FOCUSED.  Listen to your body.  You cannot hang upside down casually without awareness and knowledge of what goes where.  Do not attempt the same trick over and over without resting in between and knowing when to stop or move on to something else. It was my lack of focus and fatigue that got me injured this time around.

2.  IF YOU INJURE YOURSELF, REST.  Do not get back out there and do the same shit tomorrow!  You WILL recover faster as opposed to re-injuring yourself over and over.

3.  ICE AND IBUPROFEN ARE YOUR BEST FRIENDS.  Just do it.  You'll feel better and will recover faster.

3.  KEEP MOVING.  You have got to keep the blood flowing!  Within reason of course..if you're leg is broken obviously don't go running, but do what you can in a pain free range. I couldn't get on the pole for the first couple weeks, but I kept doing warm ups and found I could do a little more as time went on.  This helped me avoid having my injured area become stiff and weak.  Slowly, I have been able to gently test what I can and can't do.

5.  YOUR BODY IS AMAZING AND RESILIENT.  It wants to heal.. I am living proof.  Treat it right and it IS POSSIBLE.  Don't get lost in despair, you will make a come back (I still have to remind myself sometimes)

MISERY LOVES COMPANY!!! What do you feel is the most valuable part of your body?  Tell me about your injuries!

-Jessica